Day 30 & 31 Rough

Last time I was here chemo had just been added back. I knew it was going to be a rough week. I didn’t know how quickly -rough – was going to show up. In anticipation we ditched the Tramadol for Oxy. Monday evening I basically did not sleep. I could not get comfortable at all and the oxy ‘wasn’t working’. I started with my bath then took the oxy and waited for some feeling. Warm or relaxing maybe? But nothing. The rest of my house was either sleeping already or well on their way. I decided to try a guided sleep meditation with my air pods. No luck. Then I tried another. And yet another. I finally got up and started walking around the house. Tidied up and checked all the sleeping people. Settled on the couch and started to watch movies. Continued to take the oxy as instructed and noticed the pain was greater. In my sleepless state it didn’t occur to me to call and ask if I could increase my dose. I just kept getting frustrated and angry with pain and no sleep. Til it was morning. I got in the bath which always takes pain away but not that Tuesday morning. So I stayed in the bath til it was time to go to radiation.

At radiation everything just got worse. I was greeted and taken back and I told them the oxy hadn’t helped and my pain was worse. When I was put in the mold to go in the machine everything hurt. Badly. By the time I got to skin care with my regular nurse I was sobbing. The rest I barely remember because my eyes were closed for most of it or I was crying trying to catch my breath. I can’t go without sleep. I can’t go without sleep and in pain. Worse pain. Doctors soon came in and the decision was made that pain control was top priority. I was admitted over night to the hospital so we could get a handle on pain control.

Home now with the new pain relief regimen. Just wanted to update y’all. Sleep well tribe. Almost finished.

Published by mhaensgen

Welcome to my tribe. I was diagnosed with anal cancer 2/23/21, then found out it was caused by HPV. This is the journey.

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